The world moves and so must I, though what I think or say has no bearing on the world. And I'm convinced that I'm not allowed to take a leave of absence. I think that would be a bad thing--at least after what I heard on the radio this afternoon.
Andy Reid, coach of the Philadelphia Eagles, is taking a leave of absence from his job because of family issues. What really disturbed me was not so much the story, which is alarming and disheartening, but the ridiculous way in which this story is being covered.
It should be said that Andy Reid is one of the best coaches in the NFL. His teams are disciplined, aggressive, and maybe even overachieving. Andy certainly has some good players, but management runs this business in a way that cuts the fat (older, more expensive players) to pad profits and although this is normal in today's NFL, few teams achieve the success that Andy Reid's Eagles have. In 8 years Andy has won 80 games with 8 post-season victories (80-48, 8-6). When you consider his two bad years as aberrations (his first year with the franchise and 2005 when Donovan McNabb was injured and Terrel Owens sabotaged the team) he has won, in this order, 11-11-12-12-13-10 games--and the 10 game season was an amazing turnaround this year. Having made the playoffs 6 of his 8 years on board, and being liked by both fans and players, Andy has done what few coaches ever have. Andy, you're a star.
At least on the football field. This week Andy Reid announced he was taking a leave of absence from his coaching duties to be with his family; last month the Reid family had a very bad day. One of his sons pointed a gun at another driver while the other was involved in a traffic accident after using heroin, both on the same day. What I heard said about him taking this leave of absence that family, after all, should be first and that this leave of absence is appropriate. Hearing this idea on the radio left me sad and stung, enraged and deflated all at the same time.
And still I'm dumb. Coaching football at the highest levels is indeed a demanding job and some coaches are known to live in their office during the busiest parts of the year. I don't doubt that. Raising children is no easy task either. I'm finding that out. Though parenting is directly reflected in children, children aren't always a direct reflection of their parents. I won't begin to suggest that. But all I can think about when I hear this story is how little time Andy Reid could have spent with these two men the last 8 (and more) years.
I don't want to use this as an opportunity to bash Andy Reid as a father. I don't think that the evidence supports that. What the evidence seems to support is that Andy Reid is careful and meticulous with his football team and it is hard to imagine them getting any by finding any fault in him. What the evidence seems to support is that if Andy Reid were being as careful and meticulous with his sons then his spending more time with them would be unlikely to produce results any better than these woeful stories.
Maybe what disturbs me so much about this story is why it's difficult for me to describe what seems wrong. Is it not obvious that Andy Reid's success as an NFL coach may have compromised the welfare of his sons, or is our culture so fixed upon success and glory that no cost compares to the end result? Or is this just some fluke occurrence that has no relationship to Andy's dedication to work? Is there any relation between the lifestyle of NFL success (and the American ideal of success) and Tony Dungy's son's death last year? No one doubts that Dungy is a great coach or a great man, but can a single man be great to all people in the same way?
I don't mean to fault Dungy or Reid in any particular fashion, but can't we just be saddened by these stories? Maybe this leave by Andy is simply stress or grief related. I sure hope so. And this leave is appropriate, after all, but I don't think we should congratulate anyone in this story. Leaving your job for one month because of family trouble is no big sacrifice--it's not even a small sacrifice. Not when the stakes are high. Winning a Super Bowl must be a super elation. I wonder would Tony Dungy give it back if he knew he could have done something different to help his son. Probably so. I wonder if Andy Reid would have spent more time with his sons these past eight years if he knew what a lack of attention might produce. Probably he would. And maybe he will now. Still all I can think about is how this story is really a non-story and how many fathers aim to be like Andy and commit to their children when in the future. How sad it seems that these men have no idea that time is now.
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